Each year on February 14, people exchange cards, candy, or flowers with their special “valentine.” This is a day when couples express their love for each other, but for some, the cupid’s arrow can pierce right through their hearts.
While your social media feels like a heaven of romantic getaways or couples making love, exchanging gifts, and holding hands, your feed will only be looking for funny Valentines Quotes since what else could cure the broken hearts than a little laughter.
Perhaps your relationship status is happily single, or you're in a committed relationship but still here for the laughs. Or maybe you're a sardonic person who can't help but roll your eyes every time the Valentine's Day chocolate commercials come on.
Well, you're in luck. For making your Happy Valentine’s day, we have a list of funny valentines day quotes that will cheer up your mood. It's okay to laugh at love—because sometimes, as these quotes prove, love is just plain humorous.
1. Lily Tomlin: If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
2. Pearl Bailey: That’s why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they’d call them something else.
3. Jim Baker, 'Sixteen Candles': What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.
4. Charles Schulz: All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.
5. King Jaffe Joffer, 'Coming to America': So you see, my son, there is a very fine line between love and nausea.
6. Mae West: Love thy neighbor—and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.
7. Garry Shandling: My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.
8. Cameron Esposito: I married for love, but the obvious side benefit of having someone around to find my glasses cannot be ignored.
9. Tim Allen: A guy knows he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.
10. Phyllis Diller: Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
11. Albert Einstein: Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
12. Agatha Christie: An archeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
13. Paul Valery: Love is being stupid together.
14. Henny Youngman: You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
15. Rita Rudner: I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
16. Kathy Mohnke: Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other's minimum daily requirements.
17. Mika Primavera: You are never alone on Valentine's Day if you're near a lake and have bread.
18. Socrates: By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
19. Richard Jenny: Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.
20. Carol Bryant: Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.
21. David Sedaris: Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings.
22. Eric Segal: True love comes quietly without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
23. Will Ferrell: Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are.
24. Linda Barry: Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.
25. George Burns: Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.
26. Lemony Snicket: Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby—awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.
27. Joan Crawford: Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.
28. Jerry Seinfeld: Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.
29. Lewis Black: Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone.
30. Jules Renard: Love is an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.